In the Ground (Bonus Episode)

Jade – Abbey Konzen Eric – Lou Sutcliffe Silas – David Ault

Ever since that night at the sealing ceremony, I haven’t recognized the woman in the mirror. The subtle changes have become very apparent. My black hair has lightened to a soft brown. I can write that away as a hair dye or just sun bleaching, but not the rest of my face, my body. My cheekbones jut out more, sharper than my bubbly face has ever looked. I’ve lost weight but not to the point I’ve had to buy new clothes yet. But my voice, my voice not even being my voice in my thoughts. I wonder if that means I’m not the only one in my head anymore. That’s not a fun thought, but so far so good. A few moments every day I give thought to this grief of who I was, the person I no longer am. Because it’s not just my body that’s changed, but I feel more cautious, more jumpy lately. The slightest noise and I’m on high alert, which is damn near every second of my day with Fern slithering about and knocking things over. I try to keep myself busy, try to just answer the regular’s questions as vaguely as possible. They know Aunt Beattie is dead, and that it’s trauma from her death that has affected me so profoundly that I’ve experienced these changes. That’s all they will need to know, and it works. It’s close enough to the truth that they buy it, though the voice is probably the hardest for them to rationalize. I hear some of them murmuring, gossiping that maybe I had been strangled, but no they would have seen the bruises on my neck. Let them gossip. Anything is better than the truth. Along with the jumpiness, a new sense of dread has set in. Where I found peace in the shadows of my bookshelves and reading room, I now find anxiety looming over me. Because of this, I step outside more often than I used to. I always just sat by the window with a cup of tea or coffee and a good book, waiting for customers to come in. Now, I sit on the bench in front of the window on the sidewalk, and enjoy the sun. Enjoy the spring breeze as it blows in the rain. The wind on my body feels good, helps calm me. Sometimes I think it’s Gale, and in a way it always is? I don’t pretend to understand all the ins and outs of elemental territories or power, but I can whisper his name and get a response. I think he’s keeping an extra eye on me. I would too, given how much evil I carry around inside me now. The sky blazes orange in the dying of the day over the Garrison Avenue bridge. Footsteps are coming my way, but I won’t go inside until I have to. I’m tempted to tell them I’m closing, but then I catch a glimpse of who it is as they turn the corner of my store. I smile, but I’m not really sure if I’m happy to see them. (tiredly) “Well, look what the corpse dragged in.” “Ah, I see that the voice is still not yours. I was hoping that was just a temporary after effect of what we did that night.” Silas stands poised and graceful as ever in front of me, with his son, Eric, at his side. Eric looks better than that last time I saw him. Silas had to basically carry him out of the woods that night after the Buried Mother possessed him. But physically he looks back to his young, healthy self. I don’t remember Eric being that much taller than me; am I also shrinking? God and Goddess, when will the nightmare end? “I’m not betting it’s temporary anymore. Not as long as I still house whatever dark shitty energy that made up the Buried Bitch inside me.” “But you all have a piece of her inside you now right? Are you the only one with the change of voice?” “That I know of. I’m assuming it’s because I took the largest part of her, but who knows. Maybe fate is just fickle that way.” “Speaking of fickle, that’s partly why we are here.” “I’m surprised you didn’t call first.” “I did. I’ve texted and called with no response from you.” “I talk to your dad, he can relay how I’m doing.” “One random text asking me if I’m alive and letting me know you still are does not quantify as talking, Jade.” “I thought that was our thing. Go weeks without talking and then text or call, catch up on what we’ve missed those silent weeks, then rinse and repeat.” “Not anymore, Jade. Not after…” He doesn’t have to finish that sentence. We all know. Not after the Buried Mother almost killed us. Not after she possessed Eric while he was under my protection, and then used him like a mindless soldier against us that night at the sealing ceremony. “I told everyone we needed to stay away from each other so her pieces don’t have a chance to come together.” “I barely took any of her in Jade, I think we’ll be okay. But…” Silas and Eric exchange glances. Some dark knowledge passes between them. Silas keeps his face as blank as he can, but he’s never been good at it. Eric, however, wears the knowledge on his face… with calculated curiosity? I see both fear and wonder dance across his face, and in his eyes when they both finally look back at me. “Just spill the beans. I doubt you can surprise me at this point.” “I need to tell you…what her plan was, Jade. She had a plan for me, and I wonder how much of it will still come to pass.” [Intro Roll In] We move the conversation inside. I don’t want to speak of the Buried Bitch in the dark. Really, I would choose not to talk about her after the sun goes down, but they’re already here and drove hours to be here. I can’t turn them away now. But we can be inside with plenty of light and ward protection. I close the store and take them up to my apartment. I don’t think Eric is ready to go back to my reading room yet. Not after how badly things went the last time he was in there. I pour them some sweet iced tea and we sit at the kitchen table. Silas and I wait patiently until Eric is ready to talk. As he sips on his tea, I can see the wheels turning, trying to figure out where to start. “Do you have any insight as to how the… Buried Mother controlled the others?” “Sam said it felt like a dream, murky. She was aware of what she was doing but it was under a veil that made it all seem right.” “They were lucky then. She held no such pretense for me. Dad and I talked, and based on what we learned about her, I think it’s because of my tie to the dead that I was more susceptible. Once I opened that door, she was able to walk right in, and control it. Control me. I knew what she was doing, and she did try to convince me that what needed to be done was the right thing, but there was no veil. It was a struggle between us, though really it was just a struggle of my acceptance, not a struggle to make me comply. At first it was important to her that I saw her as the savior she painted herself as to the others. But the longer she possessed me, the more worn down I was in the fight against her, the more confident she was that she could ride my body as long as she wanted.” “Are you saying she was telling the truth when she told me she would leave my mother’s body and inhabit you instead?” He hesitates before answering, and that’s answer enough. Only a trickle of regret pulls at my heart, but if I had agreed to let her enter someone else, even if my mother was alive, she would never have forgiven me for it. She would have done her best to undo it. “Jade, you know that agreeing to that wouldn’t have changed anything.” “I wouldn’t have done it, Silas. I know you would do anything to save Eric, and you assume the same of me for my mom, but I wouldn’t have made her sacrifice be in vain like that.” Silas looks at me as if I just grew a second head. “There wouldn’t have been the thought in your brain to try it? To transfer her being and then swallow her down like we did?” “I would not risk your son like that. Too much was unknown, a Hail Mary. I wouldn’t risk anyone’s child that way.” Something crosses over his face, a look of surprise and then confidence. I’m still insulted that he thought I would do it, but it seems telling him that has re-instilled some of his trust in me. I’m sure I still have a long way to go before he trusts me to protect Eric again, which is why they’re both here and not just Eric, I’m sure. But we seem to be moving in the right direction. “Okay, worst case scenario you were meant to be her plan B.” “Yes, but then the vampire drove her out of me with his blast of light. She had wanted me to take control of him to use as another weapon, but the elemental kept me from doing that.” I assume he knew Marcus was a vampire from what the Buried Bitch told him, so I don’t bother asking about that. I go straight to the more important question. “You can control vampires?” “(pause, backtracking a bit) In those struggles between us, she told me how she could help me, and how I could help her. She promised me things, power beyond what I had thought obtainable for me. That I had so much potential. And she showed me some of the things as like… not quite like a video in my head, but like a memory that wasn’t mine.” “She showed you that you could control vampires.” “Yes. And that my ecto doesn’t have to be tied to me, that I can…essentially release it, like throwing a ball, or hold onto it and still use it–” “Like a whip.” He nods, and we are all silent, remembering he did exactly that that night at the circle. He flung his ecto out and Marcus, but Gale had pushed him far enough back it wouldn’t reach. I had more questions, more theories to hypothesize around just how he could control Marcus with this ecto, but the fear was returning to Eric’s face. He puts his head in his hands and leans back in his chair. “I would have made him a puppet like I was, and we would have killed you all. Everything would have been my fault.” Silas hugs him around the shoulders. “But you didn’t, son. You can’t think of the disaster that could have been, it will eat you to the core. Everyone you care about is alive, the Buried Bitch is dead.” “Well, not dead, but contained in pieces that are now scattered apart from each other.” (Eric making a feeble attempt at a joke) “What’s dead may never die.” “Did you just make a Game of Thrones reference?” “It’s Dad’s guilty pleasure, of course.” Silas playfully pushes away from Eric. “It was a good show.” Eric and I chuckle, Silas just smiles and shakes his head. This is the normalcy I need, the small talk, the fun jabs with friends. But hard to do when I have none now. Well, I guess I can’t say I have none. These two showed up, and Roz and Rachel had made some attempts as well, but Rachel is preparing for the baby to come any time now, and Roz’s main focus is Sam being on the road, and fussing over her every minute of her day. “What else did she show you that you could do? I’ve wanted to ask you if you knew you could weaponize the physical manifestation of the ecto, but didn’t want to bring it up until you were ready to talk about that night.” “Appreciate it. I was gaining control of my powers before all this, but if I didn’t know that was a possibility. If I accidentally lashed out at you or dad or…someone else and hurt you, I’d never forgive myself.” I’m interested in who else he is channeling the spirits in front of other than his dad and myself, but I let it go for now. He says he’s afraid of losing control, but the fear is sliding off of him and letting the wonder sink in. He leans over the table, as close to me as he can get, interested to hear the possibilities, and there can be many. I don’t know how much to hypothesize with him in the room. If it was just Silas, I could talk shop all day and know it’s mostly just shooting the shit on theories. But I see the ambition in Eric now that the fear has subsided. Whatever gets discussed, he’s going to want to try. “Well, we are gonna table controlling vampires for now, because that can get you killed if they know you can do that to them. But we can explore you releasing your ecto.” “I want to do this in a controlled environment, Jade.” “There’s no such thing. I can put up protection circles for you to not hurt anyone else, but the risk will always be there for yourself. Your dad can probably tell you that much as well if not better than I can. With talents that are natural and not divinely borrowed, there’s always a risk.” “Then get it as controlled as I can, please.” “Not asking to do this tonight, of course.” “Right, mostly came to check on you. You had us worried.” “I’m fine.” “As many times as you’ve fed me those lines when it was the furthest thing from the truth, Jade Allbright, those words mean nothing now.” “I’m dealing, then, okay? I’m sure just like you I’m working on trying to be okay.” “Have you let yourself not be okay? Did you just let it all out and break into a million pieces before trying to pick yourself back up and rebuild?” I open my mouth to say yes, but it would be a lie. “Some of us can’t slow down to break down.” “Bullshit. If all you’ve been doing is waking up, running that store, then coming back home and just existing, then you’ve had time to fall apart.” “Well it’s certainly not something I’m going to do in front of you.” “Why not?” “Your dad knows why.” Eric looks to Silas. Silas shrugs. “Because parents don’t fall apart in front of the kids.” Eric turns back to me, eyes rolling. “Oh, come on, I’m not a kid anymore, let alone your kid.” “Your dad trusted me, Eric. Your dad trusted me with your life, YOU trusted me with your life, to keep you safe, and I failed you both.” God damn it, I just said I wouldn’t fall apart in front of them, but my anger with myself isn’t as strong as my sorrow. “Don’t make me sound like my father here, Jade. Remember what he just told me?” “Don’t ask me to fall out when you don’t know what that means, then.” “I know what I mean, Jade. You shouldn’t be afraid to do it.” I wanted to argue, or give some snide remark back that I think he deserves, but I curb my anger because it’s not really him I’m angry at. Instead, I take a deep breath, and give him the one vulnerable piece of me that only he could have. It was another reason why I was staying away from them, because I wasn’t sure if I really wanted to give it to him, or if it was better left as a piece inside me to never be addressed. But he’s asking me to break down, and it’s the best thing to get me there. “Tell me this, then. Did you hear my mom that night?” There’s no hesitation in him now. “No, I didn’t. But it’s 50/50 on if I hear the newly dead. I’ve only had the chance to test that theory a handful of times. It’s not like I’m actively hunting people to watch die, ya know? I don’t know if it’s because I had already heard your aunt, or if it means something happened differently between them. Dad and I talk about that at length, but there’s honestly no way of knowing for sure. Just sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t. So don’t read into it too much.” I think very carefully before asking my next question. I look at Silas, and he must read the question on my face, because he shakes his head. “Jade–” “I’m not asking you, Silas. It’s his decision, not yours.” “Do you really think it’s a good idea?” “At this point, knowing what we know now, what can it hurt, Silas?” That shuts him up, and I turn back to Eric. “Can you hear her now?” He stares at me but I know he’s tuning in to that otherworldly power, actively listening into the beyond for me. “Not right this moment, no.” “Can you reach out to her?” He shoots a nervous look at his dad. He knows Silas has shot me down on this particular request for years now. But that was before we knew for sure she was dead and not just lost to us by the Buried Mother. “That’s the other thing, Jade.” “What?” “Ever since that night, I haven’t been able to call out to the dead. They can certainly reach out to me, but I guess when the Buried Mother knew she couldn’t have me, she took a piece of me with her. The piece that lets me open the door, instead of being on the wrong side of a locked window that only the dead can open now.” “He needs your help healing, Jade. To find that piece of him again. I tried, but nothing I’ve done has worked.” “Okay…just…okay. I help you, and then you help me? I mean, I would have helped you regardless, but since you agreed, then we can help each other.” “Works for me.” “Alright then, you’ve earned the right.” “What right?” “The right to see me fall to pieces. Not right now, but you’ll be there when the time comes.” “I’m happy to help you pick up the pieces.” “We both are.” If they hug me, it would push me over the edge and make me fall apart now. But they don’t. Instead we sit and talk about that night and the nights since. We make a plan on how to heal, and then once Eric feels like he’s spilled all the beans, I tell them it’s too late for them to drive back home, that they can crash here. It’s the first time anyone has stayed in this apartment in years. Anyone that matters, anyway. I take care of them, they take care of me. Maybe, just maybe, it’s not so bad to rely on the ones that rely on you. I’m sure one way or another it may come to bite me in the ass, but right now, their company is exactly what I need.

Written by Ashley McAnelly Featuring the voice talents of Abbey Konzen, Lou Sutcliffe, and David Ault Produced by Scott Thomas